.Sunday, April 4, 2010 ' 1:46:00 PM Y
blogged
Another sleepless night.
Tried sleeping at 5am but couldn't stop the things running through my mind.
tossed and turned till 11am.
Well,now i'm confused again.
I wish everything was more straightforward.
I don't want to continue trying to solve the impossible puzzle.
Just tell me the reason for every action and speech because every moment as long as i'm awake has been a torture.
I have been typing messages to you,pretending that i would send them,but i don't and they just serve to make me feel better.
Well,i love you.
What more can i say?
When i see you or feel you next to me,my hands turn cold,my body turns jelly and weak,my heart beats so fast i feel as if i am on a roller coaster.
Even as i am typing this,my hands are numb and cold.
All these things that are happening is killing me.
Please,please become stable for nothing else can satisfy me.
It has been very long since my mood has even been just "okay".
When will i be happy again??
I beg,beg for time to reverse.
If you ever leave me,i will never ever be able to forgive myself.
